When Distrust Sets In A Relationship

Are you in a relationship and asking yourself, ‘Should I go through his phone? ‘

Let me guide you through this.

Love is a beautiful experience.

When you are in love, you can open up to somebody.

You share with them every little detail about yourself and your life.

You expect the other person to tell you everything about them, too.

And this is when many relationships go on the wrong track.

You start doubting your partner whether they have told you everything about them.

You become obsessed with finding every possible thing about them.

So, you start looking for forbidden ways to extract private or secret information about your partner.

One of the most common ways to do so is by accessing your partner’s phone.

You are in the same situation right now.

But it’s good that you are still thinking about it and haven’t acted on your dilemma: ‘Should I go through his phone?’.

In this article, I will explain three major reasons why you might want to check your partner’s phone.

Along with these causes, I will tell you what you should do and give pressing reasons for them.

I will also suggest alternative ways of achieving what you want by going through your partner’s phone.

So, let’s begin.

Let’s find out whether you should go through your partner’s phone.

Should I Go Through His Phone: Possible Causes & Remedies

There are three significant causes behind wanting to check one’s partner’s phone secretly.

You Are Curious

The first possible reason behind wanting to go through your partner’s phone is your curiosity.

Curiosity is an inherent part of a human being.

We always want to know more than we already know, and it’s a great virtue.

It lets you expand the horizons of your knowledge, intellect, and experience, thus making you better.

But when you use your curiosity for the wrong purposes and sources, it may go against you.

It may make your life worse, which you might regret later.

So, if you want to know more about your partner to deepen the relationship, it’s a great reason.

It will enrich your understanding and emotions and help you bond with your partner.

But if you want to go through his phone because you told them everything about you or because you want to snoop on them, it’s a bad idea.

It may sabotage your relationship if your partner finds out you were trying to intrude on their privacy.

Trust is crucial in a relationship, and trying to secretly access your partner’s phone can destroy it.

Additionally, they may get seriously offended and may end the relationship.

It will not only be a blow to your relationship but also your reputation as a partner.

So, whatever the reason for your curiosity, good or bad, you should not act on your dilemma, ‘Should I go through his phone?’

To begin with, it would help if you didn’t tell your partner everything about you.

It’s because it may generate similar expectations from them.

And these unwarranted expectations may make you want to do silly things like going through their phone.

So, initially, tell them only the basic things about you and wait for your trust in them to grow before revealing more.

This way, you will also have the time to see whether your partner reveals more about themselves to you.

It will help you impart deeper trust and meaning to your relationship.

And when the relationship has grown stronger, you can always ask your partner more about them.

Being curious about your partner is a positive thing that can grow the relationship.

But if you become too impatient and impulsive, you might risk being intrusive and disrespectful to your partner.

So, always choose the more straightforward, accessible, and acceptable way to get to know your partner: communicating with them.

Your Partner Went Through Your Phone

The second major reason behind wanting to go through his phone is that your partner went through your phone.

Any kind of privacy breach is both unfortunate and scary.

Our phones today have a lot of sensitive information about us.

So, when someone hacks into it, we feel violated, frustrated, and offended.

And when your partner himself has orchestrated this breach, it’s even more disappointing.

Some people are insecure or unmindful of their partner’s privacy and emotions.

They may hack into your phone to fulfill their agendas or satisfy their insecurities.

It hurts you emotionally and makes you feel threatened psychologically.

You start distrusting your partner and may also decide to take revenge on them.

It is when the question ‘Should I go through his phone?’ pops into your mind.

But this is not a good plan for many reasons.

First, revenge should never be on your mind as it damages your true self.

You get diverted from being who you are towards what people want you to become.

Revenge weakens your character by taking you closer to being the person from whom you want to take revenge. 

So, if you check your partner’s phone because they checked yours, it might ruin your future relationships by changing you as a person.

Thus, revenge is ultimately a double whammy for you which is why you should drop the plan of going through his phone.

Retaining your character and authentic self is essential; you shouldn’t do anything that endangers them.

Secondly, looking into your partner’s phone because they looked into yours is childish and not required.

You don’t want to know anything about your partner, and you want to look into their phone only to settle score with them.

It may make your life unnecessarily complicated.

It’s because there are chances that you may get caught in the act, which might cause insult to injury.

You will not be able to explain yourself as you do not have any evidence against your partner peeping into your phone.

Also, you may find things about your partner on their phone that burden your mind with unnecessary information. 

Just have faith in Karma, as everyone gets what they deserve sooner or later.

One thing that you can do is become an agent of Karma, but only by using the proper methods.

You should confront your partner, ask them about it, and see how they react.

You can dump them if they deny it, and you are pretty sure they are lying.

It’s not an impulsive decision or an overreaction, as privacy is not a small thing.

The fact that your partner is lying about it means they will do graver mischief in the future.

So, it’s better to be safe and be with someone who deserves you.

But if your partner accepts that they looked into your phone and apologizes, you can give them another chance.

You can ask them why they did it to prevent similar incidents from happening in the future.

You can clear the air by giving them a satisfying answer to their insecurity. 

If your partner stays true to their promise, it will ensure that the isolated incident helps your relationship grow stronger.

You Suspect Your Partner Is Hiding Something Or Cheating On You

The third possible reason to want to go through your boyfriend’s phone is that you suspect your partner is hiding something or has cheated on you.

Maintaining a basic level of privacy in a relationship is both necessary and a right of partners.

However, transparency is equally, if not more important than privacy.

There are things that partners should honestly tell each other about, such as their past relationships.

They should also be willing to answer each other’s questions to clarify misunderstandings or doubts.

Not doing so may weaken the bridge of trust between partners, eventually harming the relationship. 

It may tempt one’s partner to do unfair things like going through their phone.

It is what is happening to you.

Your partner is hiding something from you, fueling your distrust for them.

You suspect they are hiding something significant from you.

It may be talking to an ex or having an affair and cheating on you.

First of all, you are unsure whether they are hiding something.

So, going through their phone may put your behavior under question.

It may endanger your reputation and relationship.

And even if they are hiding something, you may make a big mistake by secretly looking into their phone.

What if the thing that your partner is hiding isn’t that big?

Worse, what if the thing your partner is hiding is a pleasant surprise for you?

It will make you look silly, and you might have committed a blunder by going through their phone.

It might make you the culprit.

So, you need to be patient and sane at the same time.

How do you check if your partner is hiding something big or is cheating on you?

As a partner, you have genuine and legitimate rights to satisfy your concerns.

So, it would be best to talk to your partner about it.

Present it as a concern and not as a complaint.

Ask them for permission to go through their phone if they are comfortable.

Tell them that you need to see a particular section on the phone and that you won’t see any of their other private things.

They will let you go through their phone if they are not hiding something from you or cheating on you.

They will be willing to resolve your concerns and doubts so that you feel relieved and the relationship stays intact.

But if they become defensive about it and don’t let you go through their phone, it will confirm that they are indeed hiding a possible affair from you.

So, give them an ultimatum and let them know that not showing their phone would mean risking the relationship.

You should take it as an unsaid but clear answer if they still don’t show their phone.

Your partner not wanting to show their phone means either they are having an affair or they do not value their relationship with you.

So, in this case, it’s better to let them go.

Don’t Let Your Relationship Doubts Kill Your Character

Nobody likes to go through one’s partner’s phone in a committed relationship.

But there are moments when we doubt our partners.

These difficult times should not cause us to indulge in unethical or immoral acts like secretly going through our partner’s phone.

Just ask them genuinely to let you go through their phone once. 

If your relationship is deep and your partner has nothing to hide, they will be willing to clear all your doubts and misunderstandings.

When all the doubts in your relationship clear up, your relationship will become more robust and mature.

It will also protect and enhance your self-love, thus making life better.