How To Not Let People Get To You And Stay In Control

Table of Contents

Reacting To Negativity

Are you trying to find out how to not let people get to you?

It’s an important question.

When we let people get to us, our behavior no longer stays normal.

And our lives mainly depend on our actions.

If we do the right things, we get the desired results.

But the actions of others also affect us.

They can impact us positively or negatively.

But we do not have much control over what others do.

Sometimes when the words or actions of somebody impact us negatively, we tend to lose our cool.

We react to it by either becoming fearful or angry.

Thus, we allow people to get to us.

And this proves to be only the tip of the iceberg that is about to come.

When we react to the negativity around us, we push the panic button which ultimately traps us in guilt & misery.

Thus, you need to know how to not let people get to you.

If you can do this, you will become the sole master of your life.

Life would become extremely simple as nothing will have the power to distract you from your goals.

It would let you navigate effortlessly through the journey of life.

Let’s find out the answer to ‘how to not let people get to you’.

How To Not Let People Get To You

how to not let people get to you

So, how to not let people get to you?

Practice Positive Understanding

When you are trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the first way is to practice positive understanding in life.

People’s behavior with you may be negative or positive.

But it’s upon you to understand it positively or negatively.

If you understand positive behavior negatively, you need to work on your attitude and the way you think.

But even if a person’s words or actions are intentionally negative, you need to show a positive understanding of it.

When you react to the person’s negative behavior with negativity, it is a result of the negative understanding of their behavior.

Your negative understanding of the negative behavior of negative people gives them exactly what they want.

It helps negative people defeat both positivity and you.

Thus, you shouldn’t engage in a negative understanding of behaviors.

Positive understanding entails a minimal and targeted understanding of people’s behavior.

Minimal and targeted understanding means you have to understand it only from your point of view and not from the eyes of the other person.

Understand it in a way so that you can extract something positive and beneficial from it for yourself.

It would spoil the plans of the negative people to drag you to their level and it would also help you benefit from it.

This is how a positive understanding of the words and actions of people can help you not let them get to you.

When you start practicing positive understanding in life, you have learned the first way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Develop Peace & Tranquility Within

how to not let people get to you

When trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to develop peace & tranquility within yourself.

People are allowed to get to you when you haven’t developed yourself into a peaceful and tranquil person.

When you are infinitely peaceful and tranquil on the inside just like an ocean, nothing can get to you.

Nobody or nothing can make you fearful or angry.

Everything that comes to you to get to you and make you lose your cool, becomes lost in your peace, hence becoming a part of you.

The magic of your inner peace gets rubbed on them and turns them peaceful too.

It not only prevents people from getting to you but it also makes them your admirer.

Thus, work on developing this ocean of peace & tranquility within yourself.

Some things that you can do to achieve this are meditation, practicing inner peace, and attaining the knowledge of self.

When you have developed peace & tranquility within yourself, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Practice Silence & Self-Control

When trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to practice silence & control over yourself.

Silence also helps you develop and extend that inner peace within yourself.

When you learn to stay silent when people are trying to get to you, they lose their strength.

They start feeling that you have some divine power and that it’s impossible to get to you.

This is not incorrect.

Silence is the language of the people of the highest quality.

Confident and skilled people do not need to say too much.

And when you have mastered the art of silence, self-control will come to you naturally.

Upon developing this self-control, you will have the power of not letting people get to you.

When you have started practicing silence & self-control, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Organize Your Thought & Actions

how to not let people get to you

When trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to organize your thoughts and actions.

A big reason why people can get to you is that you are not optimally organized within yourself.

When you are not organized, you tend to get unstable & chaotic on the inside.

Even the slightest of negativity would be able to have a big impact on you.

So, people can make you react in a way they want you to.

But when you develop organization in the way you think, feel, and act, nothing can shake you anymore.

This means nothing can influence you to act in a way you don’t want to.

Organization, in the way you think and act, lets you create healthy boundaries within yourself.

These boundaries guide you and tell you the things that you should and should not do.

They also let you keep your cool by making you keep track of every thought and action of yours.

So, you never act against your will and hence never go out of control and play into the hands of others.

Your inner organization lets you make positive use of the negative behavior of people.

Thus, organize your thoughts and actions, and people will no longer be able to get to you.

When you have organized your thoughts & actions, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Lower Your Ego

When trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to lower your ego.

When people behave in a certain way intending to get to you, your ego draws you into doing those things.

It’s generally the feelings of shame or insult that lure you into doing something unwarranted.

You feel a pressing need to act in a certain way which is what the other person wants.

Thus, you need to reduce your ego to an optimal level.

Have a perfect understanding of who you are and the things you are and aren’t capable of doing.

Do not get influenced by what people say about you as it’s a trap where your ego is the bait.

When your ego comes under your direct control, you can stay calm and focused on the right things.

You no longer do what people want you to do as they are no longer able to get to you.

When you have lowered your ego, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Detach Yourself From The Behaviour Of Others

detach yourself

When you are trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to detach yourself from the words & actions of others.

Whenever someone talks negatively about us, we are pretty quick to react to them.

Have you wondered why this is so?

It’s because we are too invested in the behaviors of other people.

We feel this compulsive need to give it back to them.

We have attached ourselves too strongly to what people say and do.

Thus, what we need to do is to detach ourselves from the behaviors of other people.

How can we do this?

We need to feed in our minds that other people and their behavior aren’t a part of us.

Thus, we do not have any control over it.

If they have said or done something bad, it’s their karma and they will get what they deserve.

You don’t have to let them get to you.

You need to realize that if you go on reacting to everyone, you will waste a lot of your time and energy.

And life is too short to waste on anything.

With some patience and a lot of practice, you will finally be ready to detach yourself from what people say or do.

You will become able to completely ignore negative people and their toxic negativity.

When you have detached yourself from the behavior of others, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Be Prepared To Incur Some Losses

When you are trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to be prepared mentally to undergo some loss.

When people are trying to get to you, they would say negative things about you.

They try to make you believe that you are going to lose something precious.

It is done to instill fear within you.

Sometimes these negative people would cause some monetary or material loss to you.

This is done to make you angry.

But if you are prepared to undergo minor losses, you will not allow those people to get to you.

And when they see their toxicity losing the battle, they would give up.

Remember, that any monetary or material loss is not bigger than your inner peace.

So, always be ready to sacrifice some of these things as a price to not letting people get to you.

You can always earn money and material back through your skill and hard work.

But if you let one person get to you, it can become the tip of the iceberg.

When you are prepared to undergo some losses, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Trust The Laws Of Nature

self love

When trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to know and trust the laws of nature.

When a negative person tries to affect you negatively with his behavior, you feel like teaching him a lesson.

But all of this wastes your precious time & energy.

It also changes you as a person in a negative way and you find yourself fighting constantly.

And even when you give up giving it back to them, you feel that your inner peace is no longer there.

Thus, what you need to do is not get involved in the negative process of fighting and taking revenge but trust the laws of nature.

Negative people are trapped by their negativity.

They may try to trouble people for a moment but in reality, they trouble themselves a lot more.

They do not have any positive skills to support them and their life is a punishment.

Such people are never able to do anything significant in life.

You should know this and thus leave it to God to punish them via a natural process.

It’s because if you let these negative people get to you, it’s only your loss and not theirs.

So, do not let negative people get to you, trust the laws of nature and move on in life.

When you have started trusting the laws of nature, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Master The Art Of Letting Go

When you are trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to learn the art of letting go.

Sometimes people and their behaviors may be genuine.

They may not have any intentions to hurt you or instill fear within you.

But still, their words or actions may make you feel vulnerable or angry.

In this case, you just need to master the art of letting go.

The art of letting go can be practiced in three easy steps.

First, do not react to what you just heard.

Second, do not think about it for the next few moments.

And finally, do not bring it back to you when you have forgotten about it.

What people say are only their opinions and you don’t need to take them seriously.

You can also apply your knowledge of the art of letting go of the behaviors of negative people as well.

It’s much easier to let go of the words and actions of negative people as mostly there is no truth or substance in them.

So, master the art of letting go and you will not let people get to you.

When you have mastered the art of letting go, you have learned the next way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Stay Connected To Yourself

be yourself

When trying to find out how to not let people get to you, the next way is to stay connected to yourself at all times.

When you are in touch with your true self, you are at your carefree best.

You have the perfect clarity about your life and you have the necessary confidence to live it well.

In this condition, no one is capable of getting to you.

You are so full of positivity that any kind of negativity cannot even touch you. 

Sometimes, you are so busy enjoying being yourself that you are not even able to hear people.

So, if people try to scare you or make you angry, it’s not going to happen.

On the contrary, their words and actions may give you ideas to make your life even better.

To stay connected to yourself, it’s important that first you find yourself.

And when you do, refrain from doing anything that doesn’t define you.

This way you can always be yourself and hence not let people get to you.

When you have started staying connected to yourself, you have learned the final way of ‘how to not let people get to you’.

Develop Self-Control

The search for the answer to ‘how to not let people get to you’ is an extremely important one.

You have to find a way to not let people decide how you are going to react to their words or actions.

If you do, you not only lose your inner peace but you also risk becoming a weaker version of who you are.

When you react to the things you don’t have control over, you also start losing control over yourself.

It would change you for the worse and you would feel lost and trapped in life.

Thus, work on yourself and develop self-control to never let people get to you.

When you become the sole master of your thoughts, feelings, and actions, that’s when you become complete.

And when you become complete, your self love becomes infinite.

This is when all the good things you had ever wanted start happening for you.

So, now that you know how to not let people get to you, start creating your life your way.

Want to keep up with our blog?

Get our most valuable tips right inside your inbox, once per month!